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We’re Dating! Sort Of! Part One: Mr. Man

April 27, 2013

Kitten and Pickle Date: A study in opposition.

Pickle and I are both in a very strange state of singledom. We’re technically dating. Both of us. Sort of.

For each of us, this state of being has caveats. Our dating ventures are a study in opposition.

Part I:

Mr. Man:

Pickle decided she wanted to date. She resolved to ask someone out. She saw an acquaintance at a coffee shop. Someone she found cute and interesting. She manned up, so to speak, went over to him and asked him to dinner. He was surprised but very happy to have the opportunity. After the initial forward gesture from her, he took charge. They went to dinner. At the end of it, he didn’t kiss her goodnight. Just gave her a hug. In true Pickle form, she stood on her front step as he walked away, held out her hands and said, “You’re not even going to kiss me goodnight?!”

He walked back to her, gave her a long hug (yeah, a long hug) and said he wanted to take it slow. He wants to be sure there’s a real connection. OK.

Six dates later…..still no kiss. That’s right. Seven dates. Actual…he-picks-her-up-and-takes-her-out-and-pays-for-dinner-or-coffee….dates. And only hugs at the end. He says he wants to make sure it’s a real thing before he goes any further. “You don’t seem crazy,” he joked with her. He told her he’s gone too fast, too soon before and it hasn’t worked. He’s been hurt. He wants to take it slow. But, there’s slow and there’s slow.

They have great conversation. He’s cute. She likes him. She likes that he’s serious. He’s not taking her lightly. At some point he quantifies their activities as dating. So she’s dating him. She hasn’t kissed him. She said she’s not allowing herself to fall too deep. Not going down the rabbit hole. Yet, when she gets a text from him she makes that noise, that sigh of wonderful apprehension that only results from contact from someone who floats your boat.

He’s age appropriate. He’s a successful professional. He’s from the area and has strong family ties. He’s handsome and he’s in it for the long haul, apparently. He is boyfriend potential. He’s on a slow, steady marathon. He’s not sprinting. A year from now, we might be planning her wedding and laughing about how long it took him to finally kiss her. Maybe it will make for a great toast story at the reception.

Or……..she’s going to find out something weird about him. I can’t see it. I can’t see how this is going to play out. So, he’s been hurt. But he hasn’t learned what Pickle and I have known for months: You have to take risks. You have to be vulnerable and try; otherwise you’ll never get forward momentum. That’s what led her to ask him out in the first place.

Maybe he’s so passionate, so intense that he knows once he lets his lips touch hers, it’s all over and that touch will lead to a level of passion they can’t come back from and before you know it they are sleeping at each other’s houses every night and he’s not ready for that. Maybe.

Maybe he’s under a spell and once she kisses him, he’ll either turn into a prince or a frog. Yeah. That’s it. He was put under a spell by a witch who told him the next woman who kisses him has to be his true love or he’ll turn to a toad. I think that’s the only reasonable explanation. Pickle is an amazing, beautiful, sexy woman with a great rack. lol What is he waiting for?

So for Pickle we have a handsome, age appropriate man, looking to the future. He’s careful and respectful. A little too respectful. She’s hopeful and excited, but confused and disappointed, too. She’s been seeing him for five weeks. She’s not in a hurry and she has time to figure it out.

Like the others……he will teach her something about herself. He will put the past in perspective, give her something today and the future is unseen.

And then there’s Kitten…..see Part II


From → Rantings

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